Live Free Stuff

Black Friday? Try Green Friday. Very, very green Friday. Make no mistake, today is not a “black” day for any retailer. Today is the day that stores are allowed to magically break all local ordinances and open at 5 AM, only to close their doors pretty much anytime. The only thing black about today is the eye of the dad who gets punched because he grabbed the last crazy-sale-priced-gadget off the shelf at Best Buy. And speaking of Best Buy, I saw hundreds of people in line last night around 10 PM, bracing the cold, only to be the first to enter the building at 5 AM. Last time I checked, Best Buy prices kinda stink, but hey, whatever. I could never stand in line like that for much of anything let alone a nice discount on an LCD monitor. But hey, let’s face it, I work for Stootsi. We sell products so far below retail that I question my paycheck every few weeks. We already have all the gadgets a person could ever need. I have the pleasure of walking 30 feet into the warehouse and banging out my Christmas shopping in 20 minutes. Not bad. Black Friday? I’ll pass on the headaches, traffic, unpleasant employees, and crazy shoppers with a Starbucks in their left hand and another on deck.

So without further ado, Stootsi is officially renaming this day “Red Friday”. Red Friday not only because it sounds like a very cool former Soviet Union “holiday”, but because we believe that it is our e-tailer duty to lose as much money as possible for the common good of man (and women of course). As you can see, we are having a “Red Friday” giveaway. This is extremely simple, so do us a favor and don’t overanalyze this. We’re giving away one free item/gadget to anyone and everyone who stumbles onto our crappy site today and clicks “Buy Now”. The item we mail to you is obviously (perhaps not so obvious for some of you) FREE. Yes, that’s right, FREE. Let me say it one more time: The item we will mail to you (yes, mailed - don’t bother emailing us for a tracking number) after you ponder the difficult question of whether you would like a free item from an electronics e-tailer superpower, will be free. This item will be randomly pulled (like, we decide what we want to send you) from our warehouse and then mailed to you. We will mail these free items at our own leisure - don’t expect them fast, or even relatively fast. Perhaps you will receive a crappy item, or a really crappy item, or perhaps you will receive a less crappy item than the next guy. But you know, as well as I, that half the fun in life is JUST DOING IT.
Create an account and then click buy now in the middle of the page. There are no charges.

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